::New Year's Eve::

as i'm typing this, my boy is getting ready to board the ferry which will take him away from that island for the next 3 days. *hee* my tummy's not well, been having slight cramps even before my egg is broken?! weird, my body's all becoming strange. let's just keep our fingers cross that my egg will still be intact and not disrupt my day. *keeping fingers, toes hands and legs crossed* anyway, so today's activities will include:
1) going for night-watch service @ church. starts at 10.30pm and will end roughly after we have had our mini countdown.
2) then we are going to meet with dear's buds and join them for dinner/supper.
3) and after that, we are gonna catch the first movie of the New Year @ 1.45am. what along night! *slurps*

::Tsunami Killer Waves::

my heart goes out to the countless casualties, homeless, and to those who have been, somehow affected by the killer waves. as i read the New Paper this morning, tears welled up my eyes as each story unfolded human's bravery and the determination to survive. thankfully rescue efforts are coming from every country possible to aid the affected countries. and currently on BBC, it has just announced the latest death toll reaching 120,000. that's how many souls the sea ate up. and according to the Bible, on Judgement Day, the sea will have to "spit out" every single life which it had consumed.
putting myself in their shoes, it just made me count my blessings more and thank the Lord for the peaceful life here in singapore. putting myself in their shoes, i wouldn't know what i would do or react, dunno if i would run or even have the determination like some of the survivors to live.
this incident also made me realise that no matter how great men are, they are never a match for Mother Nature.
it is also at this time that man's faith would be wavered, confused thoughts will be clouding their minds. but whatever the case, God must have His reason. so please don't give up, and please don't stop believing, and lastly, please don't stop praying.

::Last Year::

last year this time, my dear and i just finished our most horrified student internship programme or SIP for short (fine, maybe it was just my horrible experience) and we were on the way to our very first overseas trip together.
it was a good trip, together with my parents. so the four of us set off for lunch in malacca where we had authentic peranakan cuisine, dinner in kualar lumpur where we had the famous frog porridge and ikan bakaar, and after that, we slept over a night coach heading towards hatyai, southern thailand where we spent most of our trip at. reminiscing is good, helps you appreciate events, people and places more. so we spent our new year in hatyai last year. it was sweet. *smilez* i still have some pics at home, no i should say at my boyfriend's house. will have to wait till tomorrow to scan and then upload it.
remembering how adventurous the whole trip was, my boy learnt lotsa tips from my dad on how to be alert at all times while on foreign soil because anything can happen in a split second. it was my baby's first trip this far, and to so many places at one go, he was really excited. thinking back, he was like a little boy standing next to my dad, just like a father-son relationship. *chuckles* oh well, my boy is half-way reaching that status. *hides face and blushes*
needless to say, shopping was included. and so was the many fantastic eating hunts my dad knew about decades back, and i really mean decades back. so he brought us there, one by one, and all we did was to feast on yummy food and enjoy life there. *slurps* i miss the life there! *screaming*
i wouldn't mind doing it all over again. i thank God for my parents, i love them so much. and for a wonderful boyfriend who has made me more of a person than i am today because of his love. baby, i am whole because of you, you complete me! for those of you who know my boyfriend would totally agree with me, unlike some posers who always brag about how fantastic their boyfriends are but are actually not. pathetic. *major eyeroll* why am i even talking about such losers? spoiler.
in short, i'm craving for a getaway with my darling boy! *screaming*
and finally the pics are here!!!
::our first stop at malacca::

::the very unique way of counting down to the new year all dressed up::

::on thai streets::

::the elephant village!!! i love elephants!!!::

::they're simply adorable, dun ya think? *winkz*::

::Tattoo::

i wanna get a tattoo done!!! *screaming* i guess i've always wanted to get it done, but my dear doesn't allow it. *pouts* says its too ah lian and all that. he even said that if i ever go do it, he'll smoke and drink and do piercing all over his body as well! *scratching head* a bit outta point don't you think? *lolz* but that's my baby for you. so i'm gonna try to persuade him and convince him to let me do it. *grinz* my lady boss wants to get one too. *hee*
honestly i think tattoos are fine, its pretty and because you have one doesn't mean that you're a bad gal? doesn't mean you're in a gang? it doesn't spoil your image or reputation like smoking does? not that i'm discriminating smokers but i wanna do it so badly and i guess i just wanna justify my action perhaps? man...someone tell me its fine?

::Break-Up::

i've been wanting to blog this for the longest time, with regards to one of my good friend (i think), and her boyfriend. reason why i said i think she's my good friend is because we used to be pretty close back then in poly, and we would gossip, confide and work really hard for our projects and grades. in a sense, i was the one who influenced her to the way she is today, i opened her up and taught her how to be strong and confident of herself.
that aside, so i knew her boyfriend back then too, i still know him today. all along, her boyfriend appeared to me as good-natured. if there was anything bad about him, it was probably just due to his playful nature. but he's harmless, really. until he got into ocs and got into bad influence, had a fling which his gal found out about and caused her so much grief. i hated him then. hated him for the fact that he didn't treasure her, and didn't give her the support she needed when she was going through one of the worst periods in her life because of our darn school attachment. i remembered what she told me then, she said she loves this guy too much, she doesn't wanna let him go. she said she couldn't afford to let him go, if she does, she will never love again. regardless of my advices to her, she still listened to her heart and fought for him. he, back then, still had the cheek to negotiate for a one-month period just so he could break off with the other girl. *mouth wide open* why would you need a months' time to break up with someone? moreover, they were only a couple of months's old. disgusting. after much negotiation, they agreed to 10 days, but thankfully the guy still had a heart and did it within 2 days. things after that were strained, but time would heal, or so everyone thought. but i guess only when everything went back to normal did the new environments stepped in and caused another strain. both went to do their degree at different institutes, met new people, did new things and changed. i could see the effort on the guy's part for his constant make-ups. honestly and sadly, it was my friend who changed and just couldn't find any more sparks in the relationship. naturally, how could you when you are in a new environment with so much more eligible bachelors around. blame it on faded feelings? feelings will definitely fade, it is how you deal with the changes and continue the sparks in the relationship that matter. she chose to forgive him, she chose to overlook his moment of folly, it was her choice for letting this guy be the love of her life once again. since it was her choice, she had to live with it. but now, it was also her choice which led her guy to let her go and find herself, her happiness, and her freedom. so sad! *cries* when i knew about it i teared. and ironically it wasn't through my friend which i found out about. this explains why i dunno if we're still good friends or not. attempts to meet up has failed even though promises were made, even she lied about arriving late at about 9 odd for my party. said it was due to work, but her work, which was just around the corner, ends at 7pm. i found out alot later that it was because she was out at sentosa partying with her friends that she arrived late. amazing. maybe i shouldn't have any expectations because after all, i've only known her for 4 years maybe.
i really pity the guy though, move on and find someone else more worthy. dun blame it on your mistake, everyone makes mistakes. just be sure to never let it happen again. i wish you all the best!

::My Third Template::

*hee* what do ya guys think of my new template? well, changed it outta boredom at work, so....what do ya think? its been a real cold day raining and all, weather wasn't too good here at work either because biscuit called my lady boss in the morning to ask for leave for the dunno-how-many times and of course my lady boss was pissed. and so was my boss. they were real mad. to add on, she didn't leave her boyfriend's house until the rain stopped?! *mouth wide open* honestly, the rain never stopped, it was drizzling the entire day. even i found it hard to find an excuse to defend her. my bosses said they were thinking of dismissing her, and all i could do was to keep quiet and listen to their reasons and explanation because i could empathise with them, i knew where they were coming from. but god knows what happened in the end, dismissal never came. and then again, you doubt the integrity of your bosses? *scratching head* oh well, none of my business. *lalalalala*

::Christmas Dinner::

i made an appointment with my manicurist to do both manicure and pedicure on christmas eve with my darling dearest accompanying me all the way. *hee* he felt weird being the only guy in a place filled with females, so he stuck really close to me. so adorable right?
::almost immediately after he booked out from hendon camp where he just did his 3m jump::

::Christmas day where we had dinner with his buddies and the stupid present-exchanging which i thought was really dumb *pouts*::

::our minus 26 degree celcius ice-cream log cake which we really had a hard time cutting::

::another sweet pic of dear and me *smilez*::

::too far, can't see? a close-up then. lovely huh? *winkz*::

::his buds; from left to right: my boy, jianyi, alvin::

::and on sunday morning, on the way to church; check out our super sleepy eyes *lolz*::

::Christmas Party @ the Office::

yesterday was the christmas party organised by my company for the members. it was as usual, an aunty-pushing, food-snatching, long-windedness and greediness all rolled in. we had food ordered and delivered to us from swensens, that alone cost a hefty $300. in addition, the food wasn't enough and we had to order another 15 packs of fried bee hoon from the neighbouring foodcourt who does free delivery. amazing isn't it? and the best part? inactive members, those who have joined but never bought any products, or whom we never see coming, heard wind of a free dinner, all rushed down with their families and friends. the wonder of singaporeans!
but at least my part of the present-giving was nice, i enjoyed it. *smilez* i guess that if i gave everyone a little something, it would have been nice, and i guess i was right. some were surprised and ran off to get me something in return, while others already came prepared. but at least i wasn't the one just receiving, it was a pretty feeling giving as well! because God loves a cheerful giver!
also at the christmas party, we were made to wear the silly santa hats which made us hot and look almost all alike. *sigh* but i guess the children enjoyed the hat-wearing thoroughly, so here are some pics to amuse you!
::the children and i. they look nice, just like me huh? *winkz*::

::susan and me. she's 4 months pregnant by the way, fortunate isn't it?::

::Blessed Christmas::

instead of the usual exchanging presents, turkey-eating, decorating the christmas tree and the imaginary Santa Claus, Christmas is actually a celebration of Christ's birth. did you know that? my Santa Claus, when i was a little gal, was my papa dearest. somehow, he would always managed to put our prezzies by our little christmas tree even though how hard my sis and i tried staying awake until. we never succeeded. some years Santa would be late, some years Santa would be right on time. yet there were also other times where Santa would get us wrong prezzies, but still good enough for us. i love my daddy so much! my very own Santa! he made us believe in the big man living in the north pole who only came out on christmas to deliver prezzies to every single child in this whole world. the same theory applies for Christ, except the gift that Christ gave was His death on the cross, the gift of everlasting love which has cleansed every bit of our sinned lives. think about the real significance of Christmas. here's a nice song with nice lyrics and nice music (which is also my background midi by the way) for you to enjoy. Blessed Christmas everyone!

We are the Reason - David Meece

As little children we would dream of Christmas morn
and all the gifts and toys we knew we'd find,
but we never realized a baby born one blessed night
gave us the greatest gift of our lives

Chorus:
We were the reason that he gave his life.
We were the reason that he suffered and died
to a world that was lost he gave all he could give.
to show us the reason to live.

As the years went by we learned more about gifts.
the giving of ourselves and what that means.
On a dark and cloudy day a man hung crying in the rain,
because of love, because of love.

I finally found the reason for living;
it's in giving every part of my heart to him.
In all that I do every word that I say,
I'll be giving my all just for him, for him.

We are the reason that he gave his life.
We are the reason that he suffered and died.
To a world that was lost he gave all he could give,
to show us the reason to live.
He is my reason to live.

::christmas shopping @ city::

met up with pat girlie last night at city, where i got sexy christmas gifts for my dear! *hee* well, a little hint: its from CK. CK was my last resort although i can't say i had anything else in mind, just that i knew i wanted to get him something he'll remember. oh well, guess this will do and hey, in case you're wondering, those lingerie didn't come cheap! *chuckles*
alright alright, back to the meeting up session. i guess it was a nice, warm, fuzzy feeling to meet up with people whom you were close with, back then in school. and even though we may seemed to have had so much different opinions at that time in school, it was also then did the friendships and relationships were created. and just look at the bond. amazing. so anyway, here's a pic of us, BABES!

p.s did i mention we both wore the same heels from charles & keith and didn't realise until we were about to go home? great minds do think alike! *lolz*

::What honeymoon spot is best for you?::

i managed to get into pat's blog after trying like forever! and then i did a quiz and i got the same honeymoon spot as you gal! *winkz*

Your honeymoon spot is Spain!

What honeymoon spot is best for you?
brought to you by Quizilla

::baby-sitting again::

or should i say its maids-day again! *major eyeroll* incredibly disgusting that a child has to tell biscuit "my father says you have to buy lunch for me". even though it wasn't directed at me, i felt insulted on biscuit's behalf and soon enough, it'll be my turn to get her dinner. pity us, pity me. as parents, shouldn't you be the ones to settle their meals instead of us? tolerate, i will tolerate until the day i burst, and a resignation letter will be on its way. i can almost see this day coming, soon in a blink of an eye, i'll be gone from this place. for cying out loud, we have our pride, if you still regard us as humans, equivalent to your beling as a human, no one higher or lower than the other, respect yourselves and respect your child and get breakfast, lunch, and dinner yourselves! even if they read this post and decide to fire me, i'd gladly welcome that gesture. it's no big deal working here, this company is no big deal, i'd rather go out and do some real work instead of being free all day long, idling and feeling bored. wanna hear something worser? when they finish their packed food, they just leave it on the table, expecting biscuit and i to clear it for them?! *mouth wide open* if this is the price i have to pay for working here, i'd rather not. i can't just pass it off and pretend all these services are enriching to me because its NOT! if its outta personal favor that i've been expected to serve your stupid spoilt daughter, then i'm sorrie my patience has run out, and that's it! i rest my case.

::Quill::

just finished watching the japanese dog movie based on a true life account, Quill. it was most touching, not to mention, it featured the puppy's entire life span within that short two-hour period. it was brilliantly captured which explained why it brought tears to my eyes. especially since i have a puppy at home, all the more i can emphathise with the movie. apart from the fact that my puppy isn't quite as obedient or well-trained as the labrador who acted as Quill, the movie did bring me back into the harsh reality of the short life-span of a dog's brief existence on this earth. again i teared. i barely just gotten over the puppy poem, "how could you?" and my lady boss just had to lend me her dvd which had saddened my heart again. *sobs* when will i ever get over, or rather, accept the essentials of life, death, illnesses and seperation? *pondering in process once again*

::Who Were You in Your Last Past Life?::

according to this website, they said i was a male in my past life?! *screaming*

Diagnosis:

I do not know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere around territory of modern Bulgaria approximately on 1025.Your profession was monk, bee-keeper, lone gunman.

Your brief psychological profile in that past life: Inquisitive, inventive, liked to get to the very bottom of things and to rummage in books. Talent for drama, natural born actor.

Lesson, that your last past life brought to present: There is the invisible connection between material and spiritual world. Your lesson -- to search, to find and to use this bridge.

what nonsense right? i was a monk?? *screaming even louder* i so do not believe this nonsense! *pouts*

::Top Ten Flirting Tips::

10. Flirting is an attitude: A good flirt is self-confident and not afraid to take risks. Be enthusiastic and positive, it works!
9. Start a conversation: The best opening line is saying hello. Talk about the surroundings, ask a question, ask for help, state an opinion.
8. Have fun: Be playful, light-hearted and spontaneous. Show your vulnerability.
7. Use props: Never leave home without a prop. Props are natural conversation starters. They encourage conversation and others will be compelled to start talking to you. Great props include: dogs, kids, unusual jewelry, a fabulous scent, a sweatshirt with your favorite passion, interesting ties, hats, or an interesting book or newspaper.
6. Be the host: Change your behavior from the role of guest to host. You are not the passive person in waiting, but rather the welcome committee.
5. Make the first move: Move closer to the person you want to meet. Say hello!
4. Listen: You have two ears and one mouth because you should listen twice as much as you speak. Listening is a true art. Your flirting partner will be drawn to you. Everyone loves to be heard.
3. Eye contact: Make eye contact, but please look your partner in the eye gently (no more than 2-4 seconds) and then glance away. Don’t stare – it’s a turn off.
2. Compliment: Compliment your flirting partner. The best compliments have the element of surprise. The "flirtee" will know that you really noticed them. Remember, your compliments must be honest, sincere and genuine. When you receive a compliment the best response is merely, Thank You!
1. Smile: It is contagious. It will make you so much more approachable. A smile lights up your face and draws people to you. You will be a people magnet. Try it!

you can so tell how bo liao i am at work! *lolz* enjoy!

::HOW TO TELL IF SOMEONE IS ATTRACTED TO YOU::

How to Tell if a Guy like a Girl:
1. The guy will try to make you laugh.
2. He'll flirt with you when he can.
3. He might try to show off around you.
4. He'll help you out, if you ask for it.
5. He'll stick up for you when you need it most.
6. He'll be friendly to you and all your friends.
7. He might call you for no good reason.
8. He might make fun of you, in a joking way.
9. He'll tell you that you did good, even if you did horrible.
10. He'll make eye contact with a happy grin on his face.

How to Tell if a Girl likes a Guy:
1. The girl will laugh at all your jokes.
2. She'll stare at you with a smile on her face.
3. She'll ask you who you like, continuously
4. She might try to make you jealous.
5. She'll beg that you do everything for her.
6. She might start talking to your friends.
7. She'll talk to you about the different varieties of guys.
8. She'll always seem to be talking about how nice you are.
9. She'll always be flirting with every other guy except you.
10. She'll always ask what to do in a bad situation.

how true do you think this is? i dunno. you decide! *lolz*

::ordinary friday::

it's finally friday! *phew* my bosses left town early this morning, and we're in charge of this place until their return on sunday. oh just as well, i'm starting to get real sick of this place and the people here, yah including everyone working with me. first, the baby-sitting was alright, until it got worser and worser and finally, it just reached my threshold level, and i'm just too pissed for words. *major eyeroll* the kids are cute, adorably cute and i love them to bits! BUT them for the full 8 hours that we are here, man i can't take it! and i feel so degraded because i have to take care of their needs, and buy lunch and dinner for them whenever they are hungry?! what am i? your 24-hour servant? hello, the last time i checked, i was still your secretary cum administrator cum customer service cum receptionist!!! *fuming* and as far as i remember, it wasn't stated in my job scope to get lunch and dinner for you! and for the fact that they're away doesn't make me feel any better, simply because they don't trust us! right, how could they when they have probably thousands worth of goods right in their store, right here under our tender loving care. but comon, don't you know us well enough? do we even look like we're the least in need of money for us to even steal your precious goods? or are you afraid we'll let some stranger in and conveniently take some of your goods? oh ppppllllluuuuussssseeeeee! *argh* is there still no trust even after like close to 6 months of time together? disappointed. *sigh* maybe i don't understand. maybe i won't understand until i'm a boss myself? heck, forget it. there's no point. there will never be a future working here i guess. even the computers that are equipped with microsoft office has an authorised password before we can use it, and yah you guessed it right, only the bosses know the password. *mouth wide open* everytime i'm required to type a document or do work for them, i would have to ask them to type the password first before i can start on it. like we would actually take advantage of your precious toner ink and paper to do mass printing?! i dun understand the mentality of it, i really don't. but people say ignorance is bliss. maybe...just maybe. *shaking head*
and this officially ends my complaints.

::world's "fastest" bus driver::

i'm gonna be blogging about the world's fastest bus driver in this world, that i experience every morning. his speed is amazingly fast, always speeding towards the traffic light even when the amber light is showing. and even when the bus-stop is filled of people, he doesn't ever stop and just speeds pass it. superb isn't it? well of course, i'm always early for the train which i have to take to work, i can practically stroll from the interchange to the only train that will bring me to work right on time. that's my exciting journey every morning, ain't it cool?

WELL NOT!

coz that's the exact opposite of the stupid bus driver who is always braking towards the traffic light even when it green. he literally brakes and almost comes to a stop at the traffic light when its green!? how can it be? i dunno! and even when the bus-stop is empty, he still turns in, in hope of picking what passengers up, i dunno. and because of his inconsiderate acts, i have to run for the train every morning in my heels, and in my nice clothes! honestly, what's his problem man?! i've been contemplating if i should lodge a complaint against him, but that would be too mean wouldn't it? being the Ms. Nice that i am, i wouldn't want to rack that poor old man's rice-bowl, but seriously, he could just speed up a little and not bring misery to people living in the peaceful, quiet town of pasir ris.

::Two Little Ones::

i've practically been baby-sitting these two little ones for the whole of today! *pulling out my hair* i'm a real lousy baby-sitter, and i have the least patience in this whole wide world! they're cute, and i like them. but i do not have the energy and strength to play a full 8 hours with them! *argh* i'm gonna get a heart attack soon.....oh someone bless me!

::Tekong & Daddy's Birthday::

part one of today's post will be about the dreadful island, Pulau Tekong. i realise i have a couple of pics that i didn't upload when i did the previous post on my dear's passing out parade. anyway, since i have the time now, so why not?
::a pretty pic of us on the ferry, getting ready to move off onto mainland singapore. we were both unwell with fever, remember? but we still tried our best to smile for the cam *chuckles*::

::the beautiful and artistic shot of dusk::

yah that's all for part one. *lolz*
and now for part two, daddy's big day! daddy just celebrated his 54th birthday about 2 weeks ago, and he was so happy because we were all there with our respective partners. *smilez* oh and did you know my mommy and i sponsored his dinner? *winkz*
::his favourite durian cake, which by the way, was 99.9% filled with real creamy durian *yumz*

::just see the way he laughed, full of joy and happiness::

::one big family::

::LIFE::

i'm finally able to squeeze some time out to update this little diary of mine. in a blink of an eye, another week has passed. and just like that, i'm back to being lonely here on singapore mainland, while my dear has to return to that dreadful island again. i'm not so happy because i just realised a few things over the past week:
1. life is really fragile, and death is inevitable
2. time and tide indeed waits for no man, so cherish every second, every moment with your loved ones, and make sure they know you love them
3. nothing is forever, everything will come to a pass one day
4. seperation is very painful
5. and so are illnesses, diseases and operations

::TGIF::

TGIF, we're closing into knock-off time! dinner's gonna be at his house and i foresee myself staying for the night simply because i've been real tired the last couple of days. whenever its bedtime, i totally konk out and not wake up until its time for work again. what depressing lifestyle i have. *sigh*
anyway, i just heard that Guess is having its 50% sale, i feel so inadequate because i spent almost all my money on my wedding bands. *sigh* how can i spend a happy christmas this year? *pouts*

::i just wanna help::

i dunno why you had to react this way
i just wanted to tell you other alternatives
i just wanted to encourage you
i just wanted to cheer you up
i said i'll support you no matter the result
i said i'll love you the same no matter the result
i just want you to know
i still love you and i'm proud of your posting

::dinner by the beach tonight::

biscuit and her boyfriend, calvi kor kor, will be joining my dear and i for dinner by the beach tonight. we'll most prob be at fisherman village feasting and chilling out. sounds good? definitely! practically counting down till the clock strikes 8, *sigh* can't wait can't wait!
tomorrow is finally friday, TGIF! but i still need to work the day after, so what the heck? but its ok its alright, i get to earn some extra OT pay. *chuckling* i need all the money i can get, i'm into saving up for my wedding fund. *lolz* well i guess we just have to since living in singapore ain't cheap and easy at all, so its always good to start planning early. *hee* typical singaporean, but then again, like what my mom always says, its good to save up for rainy days. well, rainy days in this context can mean another depression or recession hitting southeast asia, and since singapore is only a pee-sai (meaning shit in the nostril in hokkien dialect), we'll definitely be hit. okok, i know, outta point. *lolz*
back to dinner at the beach. did you know that the beach was the exact place:
1. we had our very first date at?
2. where our little love blossomed?
3. that he asked me to be his gal?
4. we had our innocent first kiss?
well if you didn't, i guess you do now. *smilez* ok, another 45 mins more to knock-off time!

::updates updates::

got loads of stuff to update today but i can't get my thoughts straight! *screaming* alright alright, calm down, compose myself. steady, here goes:
1. my prince charming a.k.a my deardear has decided he's gonna resume blogging again! *yay* i'm so glad and so happy that he's decided to carry on updating about our lives, his life and his thoughts again. way to go dearie!
2. today's mambo jumbo night is cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. i'm rather neutral, neither delirious, nor disappointed. but my boss was practically threatening me to take care of his wife, my lady boss, who was suppose to come with us tonight. *shrugs*
3. ran a couple of errands today e.g. cake ordering at breadtalk for this saturday's member's birthday celebration, and buying stationery for tape binding.
4. at the breadtalk situated at tangs, was this nice chinese lady attending to my order. she commented that the color of my mobile phone was very unique. oh well, yah its red and the limited ladies phone? anyway, i was flattered by her comment. *blush*
5. still at breadtalk was this caucasian man who tried to show his "superiority" by walking away from the cashier without taking his change, mumbling to the cashier and to himself that "i don't understand what you're talking about!" in his stupid accent. *mouth wide open* like come on, she's speaking english, unless you fail to understand an international language. *blah*
6. while out on errands, along the orchard underpass were some people distributing flyers, and this particular "ah-pek" gave me this flyer. it was a white sheet of paper with bolded words on it. it read,
"GET A DATE FOR ALL OCCASIONS
$20 FOR 2 HRS
HP: 93387089
AVAILABLE FOR LADIES 22 YRS ABOVE N TILL THIS THURSDAY"
even the english cannot make it. *shaking head* and i figured i must look damn old for him to even pass me that flyer. but i must add that he looked like he was comtemplating on whether he should pass me a copy of that or not.
7. i cut myself while binding. the stupid staples were so sharp and protruding, and i accidentally cut my index finger. it was bleeding so badly. *ouch* biscuit almost fainted at the sight of my oozing blood because i kept screaming "i'm bleeding! i'm bleeding!" whilst pressing for more blood. *lolz*
8. an old uncle walked into our office selling some nice prawn and fish cracker at quite a reasonable price. it looked so tempting and i could almost hallucinate them begging me to eat them, and so our lady boss bought us one pack each, except biscuit, who took 2. *grinz*
9. i know i'm suppose to abstain from fried/oily/heaty food and snacks but the temptation of opening one pack was simply too great to refuse yet another one. guilty as charged. *tougue sticking out*
10. after snacking that pack of prawn cracker, i made myself some cup noodles because i just felt extremely hungry, i couldn't function normally anymore, i just had to eat something more solid. sinful i know. *shrugs* i tried....
11. and finally, dear's brother is gonna treat us to KFC tonight! *screaming* i can't wait to get off from work and charge right to his house! yah i know, i'm a pig. so what can you do to me? neh-neh-nee-boo-boo *smug grinz*

::Passing Out Parade::

P.O.P on the 4th of December 2004, Saturday.
::at the start of the parade where the various companies marched out to the parade square. in case you're wondering, my baby's somewhere in there *lolz*::

::after the talk by the major/colonel guy, parents and loved ones were invited to wear the cap for our soldiers::

::my handsome boy looking so cool after wearing his cap::

::and i had to wait till his parents were done *sobs*::

::after officially pronouncing them Graduates of BMTC, they happily threw their caps up in the air and started running around like little school boys, one fine example::

::the band of brothers, my dear is at the extreme left::

::another band of brotherhood pic; he's at the extreme right this time::

::his super slack sergeant, who points all 3 fingers at them whenever they're in for a scolding session::

::finally it's mommy dearest's turn who also came along::

::one of his buddies, farid whom i heard, had his male organ captured on camera the night before their P.O.P *lolz*::

::his family who went except his brother::

::the grand finale would have to be him and yours truly::

::still fooling around the parade square::

::how can we leave tekong without taking a shot or two of this reknown statue?::

::a final and closer shot of the dreaded statue which symbolises the end of Basic Military Training Course *applause*::

::FAITH::

according to this website, faith is:
1. Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.
2. Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence.
3. Loyalty to a person or thing; allegiance: keeping faith with one's supporters.
4. often Faith Christianity. The theological virtue defined as secure belief in God and a trusting acceptance of God's will.
5. The body of dogma of a religion: the Muslim faith.
6. A set of principles or beliefs.

my question to you out there is that, are you able to keep your faith in your God when troubles come? think about it.

It's easy to have faith when things are going well
To trust in God when life is not so hard
But when the problems come
And the answer's not in sight,
God wants us to believe that He can make things right

Please help us Heavenly Father to trust in You today
You've always helped us in the past
Help us find Your way
We need You Heavenly Father to trust in You today
You've always helped us in the past
Help us find your way

It's easy to blame God when troubles come our way
To ask Him, "Lord why do You treat us so?"
Why do we blame the Lord for everything that's wrong?
Forgetting all the blessings we have known so long

::a very touching story which made me cry::

How Could You? -Jim Willis-

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend.

Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.

We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.

She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.

Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a prisoner of love."

As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family.

I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers."

You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed, "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.

You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked "How could you?"

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago.
At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.

When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room.

She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days.

As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood.

She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago.

She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?"

Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself --a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place.

And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her. It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

the orginal story can be found here

this story made me cry because i also have a puppy, whom we adopted 3 years back at an animal shelter. he was barely even 2 months old at the time of adoption. until now, we still do not know the reason why his previous owner gave him up. but everyone of us love him with all our hearts, even up to this day. my puppy is much luckier as compared to the puppy mentioned in the above story, and many other dogs out there. maybe that's why i can empathise with this story. maybe its also because i've always had a soft spot for animals, even though i appear to be afraid of them sometimes. i wish there was something i could do to stop the irresponsible acts of buying pets and then giving them up when the owners are financially tight, or when they are old, sick or dying. these owners don't realise it is not only the animal shelter they are sending their pets to and the hope of them finding a better home, but its also a death sentence passed on these poor helpless animals! how can humans be this heartless to send once part of their lives to death? where do they find in their hearts, the capacity to bring death to something that was once so close to them? i can never fathom the cruelty nor the heartaches that they can bear. and the saddest part of it all is that until now, i am unable find any answers as to where animals go to after they pass on from this earth, even in the Bible. this means animals would cease to exist after their brief existence here on earth. even so, i still choose to live in self-denial, hoping and praying that one day, God will change His mind and let humans and animals co-exist once again in heaven.

::depression::

the sky this morning was dark and gloomy, there was even a little drizzle when i was walking to the bus-stop. maybe its the blues of monday, but today, by itself is already so gloomy. plus the fact that my baby is sick, down with raging fever and cough since friday night before his passing out parade. by God's grace, he managed to pull through during his parade on saturday, and thereafter, totally succumbed to sickness on our way home from the dreaded island. well good for him, because he's got a whole week to recuperate from the constant coughs and colds his bunkmates were just passing to and from one other in the same section. i'm sick too, but not as severe as him. i even nursed him on saturday night, when he felt so horrible and couldn't go home. kept by side, towel-cooled his forehead, and made sure he had water to drink. that was the first time he stayed over in my house. not on my bed, but on my floor. it was never his intention to stay over my house, but he was so sick, he didn't even realise he overslept until 4.30am. he carried on sleeping on the floor even after he realised he was at my house, said he didn't wanna disturb me. *sigh* i got the pics for his parade, but i haven't the time to upload them on my com yet, probably tonight when i get home after work. he'll know his posting this friday, God holds the plans for his future. i'm sounding down, maybe its the after-effects of PMS, maybe i'm in the process of introspection, maybe i'm just feeling melancholy. outta nowhere, outta the blue. dunno why, no idea why. maybe i should just shut up and stop blabbering.

::hormones stabilised::

*applause* i've survived yet another torturous cramps. everytime i survive this, i'll thank God i'm still in one piece, alive! nothing much happened except for the fact that everyone in the office was overly-concerned if i'm well or not, because i guess i just look too ghastly for words. the cramps aren't really gone, there's still a stinging feeling in my abdomen area, but come tomorrow, and i'll be well again. because its baby's P.O.P and yours truly will be personally putting on his cap for him after his parade. *smilez* i'm so proud of my boy, you have no idea! hmmm what shall i wear to his parade tomorrow? why should i be fretting over this? i'm such a natural beauty as compared to some girls who would have to put loads of eyeliner and mascara just to give an optical illusion that they have bigger eyes. *lalala* whatever i decide to wear tomorrow, will still captivate my boyfriend and probably half the population in tekong. *lol* i'm just kidding lahz. *cheeky winkz* ok, from now till going-home-time, i still have approximately 45 minutes before we're done for work today. *counting counting*

::mambo night @ zouk::

mambo night @ zouk on wednesdays will always be this jam packed with pple even though its a weekday, and not a public holiday the next day. and so there we were last night. i had an extremely fun time with biscuit despite the fact that we were constantly pushed around by bouncer-sized pple, practically shoving their way through the dancing crowd. dear's buds were there, they had to to be there, or else i wouldn't be allowed with biscuit alone. that's my protective and over-considerate boyfriend for you. *smilez* his best friend was gonna send me home after clubbing last night, but after a bowel movement at zouk, he did a stunt which caught everyone off-guard. he disappeared after his poo session. we waited like fools outside the toilet for about 45 minutes, letting all the good music go to waste. thereafter we decided it was time we just carried on dancing whilst waiting for him to call us once he was done. we danced on our own from 2.15am to about 3.30am, where it was the time the lights were switched on. and yet there was no phonecall, no messages from dear old vin, and God knew what happened to him. we got quite worried at some points in time, and thought it strange that he should be this irresponsible given his character. we waited outside even though zouk was closing, asked around for his army friends, and finally, one of them had some news of him: he left in his friend's car.*mouth wide open* amazing. *jaw dropping* can anyone explain? no we couldn't. unbelievable. but he messaged this morning explaining he got wasted and his friend had to send him home. *blah*
nevertheless, we had fun without him. and the rest of dear's friends, rarely this generous and gentlemenly, decided to be nice for once to share a cab and drop me off first, even though their first instincts were to drop me off the last. *jaw dropping* thank God my baby, returned from his 24km walk, called me and spoke to one of them. deardear didn't even have to say anything, and they just said they'll drop me off first. the power of my boyfriend. *winkz*
back to clubbing. i felt ancient stepping into mambo night. but it was cool and before i knew it, my body started swaying to the rythm of the music. since it was ladies night, the number of bims and lians were uncountable on the dancefloor, trying to dirty dance and seduce all the hungry wolves drooling for them. while some are really sexy, some can't even follow to the rythm of the music and they were just shaking violently, where at some points in time, biscuit and i thought they were having a serious case of fits. *lol*
alright, that was mean, but there were some truth in it. *tongue sticking out*

::hormones raging::

i'm feeling frustrated at every little thing, snapping at the slightest irritatant, and blowing up at the smallest matter. like what is wrong with me? its just a case of pms. *shrugs* like what's new right? my boyfriend's off to his final 24km walk/march to kinda mark the end of his BMT, and i just had a major quarrel with him? like i dunno what the problem is, just that i know we're really upset with each other. this quarrel has just dampened his morale, nevertheless i do hope he'll be able to keep his spirits up for this tiring and straining walk. *sigh* my heart's aching, aching at the very fact that he doesn't seem to understand me. and yes, he must think i don't understand him as well. maybe its true. but i believe its purely a misunderstanding which we will be able to clear up as soon as we have the time. i miss him, and maybe its because i miss him too much that i'm being unreasonable. i dunno, its just a terrible case of hormones raging. argh!